Thursday, July 9, 2009

Day 5

The hardest thing is watching and waiting, waiting and watching. Today has been a day of rest for me. Stats level but still no change.

Its crazy how one minute your life is going along the path you are creating. Things are going well. Hiccups here and there but nothing that brings worries. Then, one night, after having a great date with your spouse you go to bed only to be awakened 3hours later to the blaring phone ringing. At first you think," I bet it is a wrong number". Then you look at the caller ID and wonder why that person is calling in the middle of the night.

Our world turned upside down in 1 second.

So many thoughts start racing through our minds. How can this be happening? What are the details? When? Was anyone else hurt? Tell me, Tell me, Tell me.

Too many questions racing through our heads to even think straight.

As it all starts to sink in then numbness follows. Like a blanket covering us. Wanting to succumb to the numbness but knowing if we do we will not make good choices when we need to.

Right now the choices are limited to what I am eating for lunch but I know there will come a time when the choices will be more difficult. I pray each day that when I am faced with those choices I will be strong and will be able to make correct ones.

Nicole's bishopric came to visit. They are all men of great strength. The first counselor was the one who called us. How nice it was to have such a calming person on the other end of the line and not some matter-of-fact policeman that we don't know from Adam deliver the news.

Her bishop was on vacation when this happened but he told me that he was prompted that something has happened and he needed to call his first counselor. That is a man staying close to the Spirit and watching over his flock. It was a great comfort to have them come and a greater comfort to offer a blessing to me. I don't know what people do who don't have the blessing of the Melchizedek Priesthood in their homes.
The peace that it brings is indescribable.

I told the bishop I had peace over the situation and whatever happened is the right thing. He also wanted me to know that she would be alright either way. That is what I have felt.

Nicole's Relief Society Presidency came to visit me. The faith and strength of these women is awesome. I am grateful for their loving kindness to our family. They have been there for her when I can't be.


Leesa said...

I'm thinking about you every day. If John needs anything while he's out here in Wichita - we're here to help.

Angi said...

Thanks I will let him know. you guys are awesome.